FINDING MY TRUTH

"Bring your vision into reality through intuition and deep purpose" - Lorna Bevan

For a long time now, I have been feeling lost and confused. About the direction I was heading, what I was passionate about, and what I wanted to do with my life (apart from being a wife and mother, of course).

In the past I had many spontaneous and crazy ideas, and I was always fearless in putting them into action (for example, an organic cupcake business I ran successfully for four years, despite having no food business experience or baking qualifications!). I was also extremely confident about my skills and abilities, so much so that for my very first job out of Uni I applied for an editorial position requiring Journalism qualifications (that I didn't have) and was successful. And so there I was, Editor of a kid's magazine at 20 years of age.

But over the past couple of years I frequently found myself hesitant to take that first step forward. What if this is the wrong decision? What if this isn't the right career path for me? What if... ? What if... ? I realised I was completely paralysed by fear. Fear of making the wrong decision, fear of failure and, in a way, a fear of success.

Last Thursday I attended the Big Hearted Business morning tea with Clare Bowditch here in Adelaide. It was uplifting to be surrounded by so many creative and inspirational women in the one room! It was also comforting to discover, that like me, many women are also struggling to forge ahead through the fear, to be confident in their skills, and to build a successful creative career. Clare is a true inspiration; she is a talented singer-songwriter, a successful independent artist, and now also a qualified Life Coach at the helm of an organisation aimed at merging creativity and business (see Big Hearted Business for more and check out the awesome Inspiration Bombs!) She has worked bloody hard to get to where she is today, and she has also remained incredibly humble and modest on her journey. Clare's insight was honest, heartwarming and funny, and her enthusiasm is incredibly infectious!

When Clare had finished speaking to all of us, and before we all gathered together to talk and connect with each other, Clare strummed her guitar and sang a song. One line in the chorus in particular struck a chord with me (no pun intended!): "You don't have to be just one thing, but you do have to start with something".

It was the moment of clarity I needed.

I've been thinking, pondering, brainstorming, meditating, journalling and reaching deep down into the depths of my soul and I finally feel I have stepped out of the darkness. Today, I feel invigorated, passionate and alive! I have more than one creative project in the pipeline - exciting projects I can't wait to sink my teeth into. Hopefully I can share more details here soon!

I finally feel I am on the path to finding my truth, to living an authentic life true to my core values. And it feels wonderful.

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver

What is your dream career? Don't be shy! :)

P.S. For those of you who are struggling with fear or resistance around an idea or business, I found this article very helpful in working through it.

A HAPPY HOME

I love Spring and its sense of renewal. Not only in nature with new growth and blossoming flowers, but also of self and home, brought upon by the big Spring clean and the lightness of longer days. I'll be sad to see it go as we enter the hot and (oh-so) dry Summer that is synonymous with the south of Australia. This year I am especially thankful for Spring because, despite it taking me almost the entire three months of the season, I have finally discovered what I need in my living space in order to be happy (and being a Mum who spends a lot of time at home, I really needed this!). The result is my own little four-step guide to a harmonious living environment, one that I can refer to again and again, to remind me that a happy home equals a happy me!

So, here's my recipe for a happy home:

1) Declutter! I am a habitual collector - I love things. This was a challenging task for me to confront. But once I got started, I loved it! I found the easiest way to start the declutter process was by doing the '27 Fling'. I took an empty cardboard box, then went around the house until I had collected 27 items to give away. Allow yourself only 10 minutes so you don't get sidetracked or over-think the process (set a timer if you get easily distracted like me!). Then put the box(es) in your car immediately, and drop off to the Salvo's/opshop/thrift store the next time you go out. Now when I'm out opshopping I find myself pausing longer to decide if I really need this or that in my home.

2) Clear negative energy. I used a white sage smudge stick (bought at my local healing centre). Light the smudge stick and gently blow out the flames, allowing the stick to smolder. Walk through the areas of your home you wish to clear (I did the entire house), commanding that all negative energies be removed. Leave your house closed up for an hour or so. On returning, open up all the windows and doors and allow the sun and breeze to spread through. You may also like to light a candle and burn your favourite incence or oil (I burned Spritual Guide incence to spread the fragrance of peace). Finally, bless your home by asking that only peace and serenity be in the dwelling at all times. *Cleansing with white sage is good to use after arguments or any upsets or traumas, and also if you have a lot of secondhand furniture, which can harbour negative energies from its previous owners. 

3) Add colour. It has taken me a few years but I've finally realised that my favourite colours are pink and blue. In all their variations and shades - fluro pink, pastel pink, coral, blush, bright blue, light blue, mint - I love them all. I discovered I had a lot of pink and blue in my house already, but it was just lost amongst all of the other stuff I had on display. The decluttering got rid of the items I no longer need or like, so my favourite things in pink and blue are now centre stage.

4) Bring nature indoors. An impromptu trip to Bunnings one early evening while Mark and Everly played in the bath (the store at the end of our street comes in very handy!) resulted in a lovely fern for our humid kitchen, a vibrant pink New Guinea Impatiens for the lounge, and a little potted succulent. Their presence instantly lifted the mood in our home. Studies show that simply looking at plants and natural elements reduces stress levels, and plants also have the ability to cleanse toxins and pollutants in the air. Next on my list is sourcing a vintage hanging basket so I can add a fern to the bathroom, and buying two larger plants to sit next to the computer and the TV.

Now, with a lighter, brighter and happier home, I finally feel I'm ready for the busy-ness and intensity of Summer.

Do you have your own special ingredients for a happy home? I'd love to know!

life is good

Life is good. I've been happily busy, making invitations and preparing things for Everly's first birthday (oh my, how is she possibly one year old on Wednesday?!?!). Balloons, plates, cutlery, cups and straws have been purchased for the party this weekend, decorations will be made, and a special cake will be baked. I'm writing the finishing touches to her naming ceremony, and asking special people in her life to read out blessings. My sister, brother-in-law and darling niece arrive later this week too from Melbourne which I am just a wee bit excited about! After five long months, Everly will finally again be able to play with her cousin in real life (and not just kiss the screen during FaceTime calls!).

I have also been focusing on the small things, like I promised myself I would. Simplifying, overhauling and de-cluttering (much like this lady!). Menu planning is going really well. I have been de-cluttering like mad, using the amazing 27-Fling Boogie to kick-start my butt into gear (I have already dropped off three boxes to the local Salvo's and Vinnies!). I'm writing lists and planning my day, consciously sticking to our gentle daily rhythm and being careful not to overwhelm Everly with pre-birthday errands and rushing rushing rushing.

Ahhhh... I'm really enjoying the extra space and time to just breathe.

*Completely unrelated, above is a cute little video Mark took of Everly at the park a week or so ago. 

expectations

Everly's first Christmas. I was filled with excitement when it began to near. But I had no idea it would suddenly bring with it huge expectations on what Christmas should be like now that Everly is here.

I had big plans. Plans to make wrapping paper with Everly using butchers paper and paint, or maybe even wrap all our gifts in kraft brown paper adorned with a red pom pom. Plans to sit down and make my own illustrated christmas cards. I had plans to mix up some homemade playdough using this no-cook recipe to make little gifts for Everly's two besties. I had plans to sew an advent calendar, a family heirloom to be displayed every Christmas, with pockets that can be filled with treats and small toys - or even just cupcake cases with twine handles strung up on the wall. Plans to buy a real tree like this family and garnish it with handmade decorations.

Did I get any of this accomplished?
Nope.
And, I can proudly say, I don't care one bit!

This year has been all about HUGE expectations - namely 1) the birth of Everly and 2) the birth of myself as a Mum. Two amazing life-changing events that went very differently to how I saw them unfold in my mind. And it's taken me six-and-a-half months to figure out (with a whole lot of depressed days, tears, anger, frustration, soul searching and therapy sessions) that it doesn't matter. What matters most is those special moments - labouring at home, in my own space, surrounded by love and excitement... arriving home after those two endless days in hospital, sitting on my own lounge and stroking Everly's hair as she cuddled up to my chest... Mark and I gazing in wonder at the little life we created, just sleeping there so peacefully between us... her first smile... her first laugh. All those things, and so much more. They are what really matters.

So, this year, Christmas is our usual, stumpy, plastic tree, decorated with IKEA balls and tinsel. The gifts are messily wrapped in cheap wrapping paper. On the mantel are two Cadbury advent calendars. But I'm smiling. And I have Everly and Mark and my amazing family and friends. There's always next year for handmade and crafty (and I might even be nice to myself by drastically reducing that crazy Christmas To Do list.)

I did accomplish one thing I had planned - I managed to restrain myself from buying too much for Everly. We tried to focus on only four gifts (as suggested by Simplicity Parenting via Claudia) - something they want (Everly is too young to 'want', so this was the perfect opportunity to buy the rainbow puzzle blocks I love), something they need (a wooden activity walker [thanks Em for the tip-off], plus a small pull-along deer on wooden wheels, for when she starts crawling/walking), something to wear (a cute Bebe romper to wear on Christmas Day) and something to read (okay, so I did buy her five books...) But I'm quite proud to say all of her gifts are practical or sustainable. (Oh, except for the cheap-yet-so-amazing fluro pink pool I just had to throw in the mix - idea totally stolen from Claire!).

Anyway, the main point of this post was to thank you for visiting, for reading, for caring, and for your lovely comments this year. I wish you all a wonderful Christmas filled with love, laughter and happiness!

Here's to 2012 - the year of no expectations! x